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Do you find yourself in a battle with certain patients?
The proposition for effectively handling resistant
patients is to take on the same attributes and skills as
that of a leader. In order to get a patient to believe
in you, and your recommendations, they need to trust
that you are the expert.
Leaders are not necessarily born; they aspire to that
role and then learn information and skills to get them
there. Leaders first form relationships with their
followers and then concretely (and with finesse) offer
them their best guidance. A leader understands the
concept of collaboration, the art of partnering with
people. Before a professional can become an effective
Leader, certain obstacles must be removed.
Obstacles To Being A Leader:
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You neglect your own needs by putting the patient (and
everyone else first)
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You stereotype people
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You have a need to be "Boss"
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You lack effective problem resolution skills
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Your communication skills are either passive or
authoritarian
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You do not know how to influence or motivate
The Leader:
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Takes time to listen and understand the patient
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Willing to give credence to the patients point of view
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Treat Patients as equals
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Identifies and solve problems
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Communicates openly and honestly
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Speaks with authority and from the heart
When developing a relationship with a resistant patient
it is important not to talk above the head of the
patient or to take a passive approach. Either of these
two styles will encourage a power struggle where
inevitably the patient wins the battle but loses the
chance to look and feel better. Authoritarian and
passive communication includes overt and subtle
manipulation, coercion, and control. That is the stuff
resistance is made of. Patients who are not happy being
treated that way move on to another facility and take
their business (and their referrals) with them. Learn
the skills of a leader and your potential for growing
your client base increases by leaps and bounds. Here is
what works:
Create an imaginary boundary to prevent patient
resistance from activating your annoyance.
Stay positive at all costs. If you do take their “No”
personally, you have lost.
Work on your self-esteem.
Tell yourself that you are not the target.
It is their insecurity that is preventing them from
understanding and appreciating the value of your
services.
The most important fact you can learn about dealing with
patient resistance is that every human being has a need
to feel secure. Whenever security is threatened by a
loss, a wall of resistance comes up. Patients worry (but
don’t necessarily share their concerns with you for fear
you will outtalk them) that they will lose money and
control of making their own decision or lose “face.”
Relationship-Building Skills are what it takes to
circumvent and alleviate anxiety and create rapport,
respect and trust, the keys to being a Leader. In
essence you become a Mentor, a Coach and a Guide to your
patients. Here are the four concepts that may help to
transform your reluctant, resistant patient into an open
willing listener for you to provide information to.
Connection: A smile, eye contact, a firm
handshake, genuinely saying their name, leaning slightly
forward when you talk with them and remember you
earnestly want to work with them). All these
“psychological” techniques create the “Bond” that make
your clients feel secure with you. It is the beginning
of loyalty. It is the beginning of credibility and
trust.
Conversation: Keep the focus on the
client. Chitchat before you investigate what they want.
It helps them to relax. It will be easier for you to
understand what they want and how to give it to them.
Client-Centered Communication: Really
listen to their needs. Turn off your mental radio
station and tune into theirs. Repeat business comes from
90% listening and 10% talking. They will know you
understand them, not when you say, “I understand how you
feel.” But when you repeat in your own words what they
have said.
Collaboration: The joining together of two
minds for the sole purpose of working together to find a
solution to a challenge, problem, issue, conflict or
difference of opinion. This means the two of you are
interacting to make the discussion the most pleasant and
productive it can be. Patient collaboration is a fait
accompli when you know what they want and what
they need. They want to look and feel better and
they need to feel secure. Make them feel secure
with you. All you have to do is be kind, courteous and
considerate of their needs and if you can fill them why
would they want to go to anyone else!
Arlene Alpert, MS, LMHC is President/CEO of Jupiter
Consulting & Training Institute, 561-744-4988 or email
ALPERT10@aol.com
- Website:
www.arlenealpert.com
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